The First Week of School

After spending the past two decades as a student, it seemed a little odd going back to school as a teacher.  The excitement and anticipation that typically surrounds the first day of school came to its climax when I was handed the microphone during the Monday morning assembly in front of 1,500 Thai students. “Sawatdee kraup (Hello).  Pohm chew James kraup (My name is James).”  The students roared with laughter at my mispronunciations.  I continued, “Pohm maa jah New Jersey kraup (I come from New Jersey).  Pohm yin dee tee dai maa Thawangpha (I am very happy to be in Thawangpha.)  I am looking forward to teaching many of you English and also getting to know you!  Karb kun kraup (Thank you)!” 

As I walked around campus with Josh, the two of us clearly standing out as “farangs,” the Thai students pointed, whispered, giggled, and in some cases just burst out laughing at our unusual presence.  The Thai teachers dressed in uniforms and looked like flight attendant, while we looked like two backpackers cloaked in semi-formal attire (at least that’s how we felt). 

I was eager to finally get into the classroom and find out the students’ levels of English and simply what teaching would actually be like.  I walked into my first class and was prepared from orientation for the unfamiliar series of events that marks the beginning of each class: the students stand up and say- “Good morning, teacher!”  I reply, “Good morning, students!  You may sit down.”  “Thank you, teacher!” And we’re off...

In my classes the Thai students go by their English nicknames, which are usually some random English object or adjective and make for some pretty hilarious nicknames.  My favorites are: Soap, Golf, Sack, Moss, Thing, Ball, Gift, Fun, Blue, Cake, Moo, Big, Game, Boss, Mild, Pooky, Noon, Bam, Dream, Milk, View, Flame, Apple, Tiger Woods, Cream, Mop, Park, Cat, Toy, Fame, Lady, Oil, Pooh, M, Fang, Palm, Guitar, Meow, Pancake, Dear, Honey, Barbie, Earth, X, Bat, Arm, Tape, Ice, Up, James, Zigzag, Ping Pong, F, Bye, Dance, Bieber, Wave, Visa, Rabbit, Genie, Bank, Mint, and Stamp.  I have no doubt that this is the first time in the history of writing that those words all appeared in the same sentence. 

With my first week of teaching now in the books, I would say that it went much smoother than expected!  My lesson plan consisted of “getting to know you” questions, which served to not only break the ice, but to gauge the students’ levels of English and discover exactly what I’d be dealing with. A top priority was to get through each class without any major “train wrecks,” and so far the train is safely on track.  Woot, woot!  I was thrown a few curveballs when several female students told me I was “handsome” and asked if I had a girlfriend, and when I was practicing the pronunciation of words ending in “ix” (because Thai people have trouble with that sound) a student shouted out that I should change the word “six” on the board to “sex,” but the show went on.  I was reminded of the “crushes” I used to have on some of my teachers and the inappropriateness that resulted from the early teenage years (clearly that’s long over), so now being a teacher seems a bit like closing the circle of karma.

Half of the 40+ students didn't show up, making class more manageable

Teaching 20 different classes a week to around 45 Thai students naturally creates some ups and downs throughout the school day, let alone the week.  For example, teaching the youngest and “most able” students was much more rewarding than teaching the older, uninterested, and misbehaving students.  The challenge will be to salvage the latter difficult classes and make the most out of them for the students.  There is an extreme spectrum of English literacy not only from one class to another, but also within the same class.  Some students memorized entire speeches in English, while others were unable to respond to the simple “getting to know you” questions.  The students are separated based on age and ability in a ranking system that consists of two numbers.  The first number pertains to age and the second regards ability.  The “age digit” works sequentially from 1, which includes students mostly around 12 years old, to 8, which is comprised of students around 18 years old.  The “ability figure” works something like this: 1 is the best class, and then the order jumps to 8 and steadily declines until the “least able” class of 2.  For example, 1-8 represents the youngest and second “most able” class within that age group.  7-2 is the “least able” class in the older age group of 7’s.  Naturally, the students’ degree of misbehavior corresponds to their “ability” level (and perhaps is also the partial result of their “ability” level, but that is another discussion).  In general, I have been able to use one basic lesson plan throughout the week for all the different age and ability levels, while simply tweaking material for each class as it seems fit.  On one hand, the schedule can get somewhat monotonous, but on the other hand, it enables me to become more comfortable with the lesson plan and have the opportunity during the week to reevaluate whether the material was conveyed successfully or not.

The first week of school has made me empathize with teachers a lot more.  The idea that “those who can’t do, teach” is complete bullshit.  Teaching is for real, man.  Within the first week of teaching in Thailand, my patience was repeatedly tested, my improvisation skills were incessantly invoked, and I learned that playing hangman can save your ass.  More importantly though, the fruits of your labor can be very rewarding, teaching in the classroom makes you live in the moment, and being around smiling students all day makes you feel forever young.